"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Randomize
