waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
Im part way to drunk.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
