i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
