Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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