What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
okay pat passed out under dana's car
I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
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