i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
