How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
