I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
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