Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Randomize
