how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
our cab driver is having phone sex.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
