at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize
