I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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