if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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