u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize
