but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
