so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Randomize
