I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
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