do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
