Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Randomize
