HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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