You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
Sex in the backyard? Check.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
