I heard we made out
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Sext me about skeletons
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Randomize
