He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
