Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Randomize
