i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Randomize
