I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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