Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize
