There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
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