her vagine was all disorganized.
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
