Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
