Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Randomize
