the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize