Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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