There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Randomize
