I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
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