My friends, they love my intelligence
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
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