East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize