He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Randomize