ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Randomize
