I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Randomize
