can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
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