This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Randomize
