don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
