True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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