Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize