he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize