Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
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