Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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