I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize
