Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Randomize
