If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Randomize
